Couple Therapy

Considering Couple Therapy?

If you haven’t experienced couples therapy before, it’s completely natural to feel a little unsure or even daunted. Taking that first step can feel big, so here are a few gentle principles that might help:

Look for an experienced couples therapist. Spend some time browsing directories and professional listings, and notice the qualifications, approach, and personal qualities that feel like a good fit for both of you.

Start with an initial session. Most therapists offer a first meeting where you can get a sense of how it feels to sit together in the space and whether the relationship feels comfortable and supportive.

Expect a balanced, structured conversation. A couples therapist will help you share the time fairly, express your feelings more clearly, and communicate with each other in a constructive, grounded way.

Whether you’re contemplating separation, hoping to stay together, or simply wanting a relationship ‘MOT’, therapy offers a space where each of you can be heard, better understand what’s happening, and explore options for the future with clarity and care.

What to expect…

I regularly work with couples facing dilemmas in their relationship. One of the first steps is the debrief - talking about what’s going on - and starting to recognise well worn patterns, a path to untangling the presenting issues. It’s quite common to feel like you’re having the same, circular arguments or revisiting familiar problems.

The sessions provide a forum for the issues to be aired in a manageable way. There’s the opportunity to clarify the most critical issues and also space to describe your own personal experience. It’s part of my job to ensure that you both feel comfortable - I hold the space for you and ensure you are both heard equally.

The initial sessions for couples are 1hr 20 mins, giving you both time to reflect on what’s happening. By the end of each session you should have a sense of what’s been achieved, where some work is needed and a clear outline of any potential homework. Many couples find the longer sessions very helpful and stick to the longer format, but a 1hr session is also available and sometimes this will work better with schedules and your diaries. You do not have to commit to exactly the same time every week or every two weeks - we can be flexible, working with your timetables and my availability.

After a several initial sessions, there’s an opportunity to have several individual sessions before getting working back together. These sessions can be useful to identify your own personal habits and patterns that might not be serving you and the relationship. When I’m working with you directly, I provide you with tools and ideas to support some beneficial, behavioural change. Often there’s an opportunity to experiment and try different behaviours within couple therapy - sometimes the smallest difference, or something considered insignificant can create a powerful shift.

Practicalities - ahead of the first session

The registration process takes place ahead of booking a session. A terms document outlines the nature of confidentiality, cancellation policy, code of ethics and the registration form requires contact information; GP surgery details and a list of any medication you are currently taking. We also agree by way of signature on the terms doc that we all hold confidentiality; sessions are not recorded and you agree to me holding some of your data.

Any questions? Let me know via the contact page or feel free to call me.